How To Fix a Stale Relationship

Is finding time alone with God a burden for you? Do you find yourself arranging and measuring your time with God instead of simply desiring him? Feeling relieved when your bible time is over and checked off on your check list? If your answer to all these questions are yes, then we can almost confidently say that you have a stale relationship with God.

The definition of stale is, “no longer fresh and pleasant.” Some good questions to ask yourself daily are:

-Are you putting your relationship with God first?

-Do you talk to God as much as you should?

-Are you constantly desiring God, or are you measuring the time you should seek God?

So how do we fix a stale relationship? The solution is to make God your source of freshness. 

If you are not making God your source of freshness, then how can he ever be your source of freshness? Our relationship with Jesus is like any other relationship we have with our partners. Like any relationship with your spouse or partner, if you never depend or see your partner as your happiness, then they will never be your source of freshness and happiness. Just because you say “I love you”, give them a kiss, and hangout with them everyday does not mean that you see them as your happiness nor love them. If you continue to focus on someone or something else other than your partner as your source of happiness, then how can you ever see them as your source of happiness?

This goes the same with God – if we focus on something else other than God as our source of joy, then we will never open the way to see God as our source of joy. Just because you go to church, read the bible, or pray does not mean you see him as your source of freshness and joy.

To fix your stale relationship with God, first identify what you depend on as your source of freshness, and exchange that with God. If social media is a greater source of joy and refreshment for your day, then remove that with more time spent on reading his word. Change your perspective and see God as your source of joy, and that will be the start to fixing your stale relationship with him.

Psalm 42:2 says, “My soul thirsts for God, the living God.” Are you thirsty for God? Do you feel the need for him? Or is time with him an obligation? It can be easy to breeze through life without acknowledging God, but the fact is we need him every single day of our lives. We need that thirst for God so we can have the desire to seek him with all our hearts. Before we can thirst for God, we first need to see God as the source to relieve our thirst. Just like with water, before we can thirst for water, we first need to see and acknowledge that water is the source to relieve our thirst.

Do not pretend to be open with Jesus, but rather keep your life open to him. When you open your mind and heart to Jesus, then you will open the way for his joy to fill your heart. I encourage you all to pray and ask the holy spirit to fill you with a never ending supply of joy from God. God wants us to constantly desire him, as he desires us.

Joy from God was never meant to be a one-time thing. Psalm 16:11 says, “You will show me the way of life, granting me the joy of your presence and the pleasures of living with you forever.” His joy was meant to refresh us ever single day for the rest of our lives. So remember, you can turn your stale relationship into a fresh one.

11 Comments
  1. Hi Gaby…I like this.
    But, I do question what you mean when you refer to “your spouse or your partner?”
    Does “partner” mean in your thinking opposite sex or can it mean the same sex partner implying they live together as a couple, in your thinking? If it is the later maybe clarity would be appropriate here on your part. So that if a gay person read your blog they would know exactly what God’s word is regarding same sex intimate relationships. Don’t you agree? Keep smiling!!!

    I hope you will reach me at my website or call as I want to pick your brain if you don’t mind for a few minutes. If you are to busy…that is fine. Thank you and God Bless you! Lance Woodworth

  2. Hi Lance,

    Thanks for you input this is great =) sorry for the late reply just got a chance to see all my comments! And yes feel free to call me to ask about any questions that you may have.

    God bless!

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